The
worst thing about growing up is how complicated things can be. I miss those
days when I can honestly say when something is wrong or right, without having
to consider the nuances of the situation. Things are just too complicated right
now, and for the first time, my instinct is telling me to shut up. Which is
weird, since I rarely shut up.
I'm
sorry for not blogging in a long long time. Work is keeping me insanely busy
with 12-hour workdays, skipped lunches, and general insanity. That's another
bad thing about growing up: the fact that you have to work to actually live.
Where's that millionaire benefactor when you need one?
Don't
get me wrong, I actually like my job. The only problem, well, from my
perspective at least, is that it is the type of job that forces you to choose
between it and your personal life. The only way I can be good at it is to
practically forego everything else. Which is what seems to be happening lately.
I wish I knew what to do.
And
loyalties. My god, I hate being stuck in the difficult situation of having to
choose between two friends. Where choosing to do the right thing for one means
being disloyal to the other. I'm starting to understand why doing the right
thing sometimes sucks. Sometimes, it could cost you a valuable friendship.
Things
will work out I'm sure. They always do. I'm just worried that by the time the
dust settles, I would see a landscape that is strange and unfamiliar.
Actually,
that's how things feel now. So really, how bad could things get?
Please
don't answer that. That was rhetorical. I know things could actually get worse.
Stupid life.
Yes, life was so much simpler when one was growing up! However with out the process, we would not be where we are today
ReplyDeleteAwww.. That's so true. Doing the right thing sucks, big time!! But well, it is the right thing to do.. Yep, life is not fair, most of the time.
ReplyDeleteNamiss ko rin bigla ang kabataan ko.. when life seems so easy. I didn't have to worry about anything, except maybe during recess time at school.. eat the peanut butter sandwich or trade it for a slice of pizza. ganun lang.. pagkain, baon, tulog, laro, etc. Ambabaw ano? hehe..
Inabangan ko tlaga ang post mo. Don't ya worry. Everything will be alright. :)
You are so right. My kids are going thru this exact moment in their lives as well and it is very difficult for them. Between work and school.. My daughter is always giving a shout out on her Facebook.. "Okay, finals are over, work is slowing down, if I have any friends left, let's hang out!"
ReplyDeleteThe silver lining? It actually gets better, not worse. :)
Life goes on . . . anyhow, anyway.
ReplyDeleteJoy always,
Susan
Being responsible and true is sometimes such a chore.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to my life.
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear you are enjoying you job. Just be sure you make a least a little time each week just for you. Finding balance is important or otherwise you will wake up one day and wonder what happened to your real life - the one outside of your career. Happy Weekend!
ReplyDeleteThings will sort themself out in the end, they always do. I must say that I am not really looking forward to the last phase of growing up at all.
ReplyDeleteHey fickle, great post as always!
ReplyDeleteJust a question, how did you get that little facebook 'like' button on your post?
Cheers!
-Ed.
Great to see a post from you pop up on my sidebar. Sorry to hear you are having to work so hard and that you are having to make some difficult decisions at the moment. I hope it all works out for the best for you though. It's great that you enjoy your job.
ReplyDeleteI hear ya, sista! The other day I told my friend that I was sick of being a grown up already and I'm only 21 yrs old!
ReplyDeleteI agree with The Empress--finding some balance every day is important. Love the graphic for this post.
ReplyDeleteI can still remember how easy things were when I was younger but growing up is inevitable- we just have to deal with it and be happy.
ReplyDeleteFickle Cattle, I know JUST WHAT YOU MEAN! I work 14 hour days (because it's the kind of job where you do or do not - there is no try) and as a result I have no life. It's driving me crazy because I can't even write and what is the point if I can't write? I'm just trying to get through it to the other side but like you say - it could be worse.
ReplyDeleteJai
Hang in there. Things may get better or not so much better will not be certain. Pln something good for yourself for you vacation time or (for the end of the project). Look forward to that it becomes a little easier.
ReplyDeleteAs for speaking the truth, eventually you may have to anyway, why not get it over with now. You will know for sure where you stand.
This is Munir from Focus. I am not able to post the comment as myself.
things could get worse, but would they? hindi naman sana. whatever your decisions, go dun sa mapapanindigan mo para hindi mo pagsisihan later. lahat naman tayo dumadaan sa down times sa buhay; here's just sharing some good vibes. hoping things would get better for you soon, ficklecattle!
ReplyDeleteI feel like that sometimes, that life has gotten complicated, but what are your alternatives? And as far as being disloyal to one friend in order to do the right thing, I feel like the wrong thing always leaves me feeling so bad that I would rather have given up both friendships if that were an option.
ReplyDeleteThe right thing sucks sometimes but there's no substitute for going home at the end of the day doing what you tell everyone else they should do in their own personal lives. I am in a similar situation with my mother-in-law whom my wife and I lied to in order to come to the US to marry... She doesn't know we're married but she would never approve. Tough decisions!
Painful growing up no?
ReplyDeleteI'm studying to be a lawyer.
Fancy school and all.
Always wonder if I'll throw it all away.
Not one for half measures.
I know what you mean. While having the freedoms of an adult is great, the situations are more complicated and confusing. Doing the right thing does suck sometimes, but is necessary.
ReplyDeletejust do what makes you happiest, you make situations worse by thinking of them in a negative fashion. sometimes you just need reminding to be greatful and that makes you feel better. http://livinglikelaree.blogspot.com/2011/05/i-am-thankful-for.html that post might help x
ReplyDeleteI can't stand the fact that life is so damn backwards. The worst thing to do is the easiest! Sometimes it seems like doing the right thing isn't worth it...
ReplyDeleteThat's why I never wanted to grow up when I was a kid. But yeah, we got to deal with complications after all. Just make sure that with whatever you do, you're happy about it because it makes things less complicated :)
ReplyDeleteI disagree. I think as one grows up and (hopefully) gains wisdom, one cannot fairly categorize something as black or white (wrong/right). I humbly think that wisdom is all shades of grey -- that perspective changes to see that everything has both good/bad, right/wrong, yin/yang in it. It them empowers our ability to choose on which aspect to focus -- a person/situation/location/thing's positive or negative aspects.
ReplyDelete