This morning, during what was becoming a regular mad dash to work, I came upon a guy looking for his dog in our apartment building. Apparently, his dog rushed out while they were on the elevator and at that precise moment when the doors were about to close. He also didn't have the presence of mind to quickly check which floor the dog ran off to, so now he was forced to go through each floor of the building to look for his pet.
Which was all very unfortunate for him, and I did feel some amount of sympathy, but all of these details were thrown out the window the moment I realized he was wearing nothing but boxer shorts and a boxer shirt. He was going through all the floors of my building practically naked.
Now, call me a prude, but I'm pretty sure that walking around in your underwear in an apartment complex pushes the boundaries of propriety, even granting that you are so disoriented by the fact that you just lost your dog earlier. I mean, it takes two seconds to put on a decent pair of shorts and a shirt. Are you seriously going to tell me you didn't even have time to do that?
So, there he was, walking around as if looking like that in a public place was the most natural thing in the world. He then asked me if I saw a dog on my floor, and I said I didn't have time to look, and that I didn't see any. I was also very quick to avert my eyes, lest he think I was checking him out in all of his half-naked glory. (He was fairly good-looking though, which I guess I can consider a mitigating circumstance).
I shared an elevator with him for a couple more floors, until he left on the third, to go around and shock more people with his nakedness I believe. Now that I think about it, maybe it's his way of getting people to stop so that he can ask them if they saw his dog somewhere.
You know what would be funny? If his lost pet was a bird.
"Have you seen my bird?"
"Not yet, but if you bend over at a certain angle, I'm sure I would soon."
Yes, my sense of humor is juvenile. Sue me. I'm blaming it on the fact that I'm not emotionally prepared to be accosted by half-naked men so early in the morning.