The
worst thing about growing up is how complicated things can be. I miss those
days when I can honestly say when something is wrong or right, without having
to consider the nuances of the situation. Things are just too complicated right
now, and for the first time, my instinct is telling me to shut up. Which is
weird, since I rarely shut up.
I'm
sorry for not blogging in a long long time. Work is keeping me insanely busy
with 12-hour workdays, skipped lunches, and general insanity. That's another
bad thing about growing up: the fact that you have to work to actually live.
Where's that millionaire benefactor when you need one?
Don't
get me wrong, I actually like my job. The only problem, well, from my
perspective at least, is that it is the type of job that forces you to choose
between it and your personal life. The only way I can be good at it is to
practically forego everything else. Which is what seems to be happening lately.
I wish I knew what to do.
And
loyalties. My god, I hate being stuck in the difficult situation of having to
choose between two friends. Where choosing to do the right thing for one means
being disloyal to the other. I'm starting to understand why doing the right
thing sometimes sucks. Sometimes, it could cost you a valuable friendship.
Things
will work out I'm sure. They always do. I'm just worried that by the time the
dust settles, I would see a landscape that is strange and unfamiliar.
Actually,
that's how things feel now. So really, how bad could things get?
Please
don't answer that. That was rhetorical. I know things could actually get worse.
Stupid life.
